I don’t like myself.

A woman walked into my clinic one day after making an appointment to see me because she wanted to lose weight.  Over the phone, before we met, I gave her the usual pre-consultation weight loss tasks to complete before her appointment.

If you saw this woman, you would be excused for not recognising that she was overweight.  It was immediately obvious that the issue was not her weight.

She was a size 8, wearing size 12 or 14 clothes.  Her clothes were obviously baggy, hanging straight from her shoulders, and they were plain and without colour.  She looked pale and unwell, but not overweight.

She informed me that the baggy clothes were to cover up the weight issue, and the lack of colour served its purpose to draw everyone’s attention to anywhere but herself.

She wore no makeup and did not own a mirror, nor did she have any use for a mirror as she had no desire to look at herself.

We had quite a few sessions together as we spent time working on her many beliefs that were not serving her well.  The perception that someone has of their weight is often a very complex issue.

Then, one day, I was greeted by a lovely woman, with stylish fitted size 8 clothes, brushed hair and makeup on, wearing the most wonderful smile that seemed to light her up from within.

Guess what she said -”I am a beautiful, intelligent and vibrant woman who has a wonderful life to live, and I love myself”.  Then she added the most wonderful comment – “Thanks to me“ (meaning herself). She got it and still has it, and is using it to live her life very well.

We do not need to carry into our current life something that someone said to us years ago.  Just ask yourself – do I own this, and will it serve me well if I keep it.  If not, it is not yours and never was.

Written by Cathy Lee.

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